We are launching into a new series, investigating how we can love our families best. This is a problem for us, because in some ways, we haven’t picked our “primary role” in our family. What does that mean, and why should we do that?
Lifegroup Discussion questions after the break!>
Special thanks to Lynsie McDaniel, who put this week’s discussion questions together for us.
If you’re the leader of the group, have them open to this page on their mobile device. Remind them that if they missed the message, they can always catch up before the discussion by listening to Sunday’s message here.
Who I am determines what I do.
We have a few Biblical examples of who the people decided they were determined directly what they did.
Jonah 1:1-3
The Lord gave this message to Jonah son of Amittai: “Get up and go to the great city of Nineveh. Announce my judgment against it because I have seen how wicked its people are.” But Jonah got up and went in the opposite direction to get away from the Lord. He went down to the port of Joppa, where he found a ship leaving for Tarshish. He bought a ticket and went on board, hoping to escape from the Lord by sailing to Tarshish.
Jonah decides that he isn’t going to be God’s messenger to Ninevah, so what he did was flee. And that resulted with him ending up in the belly of a fish.
In 1 Samuel 17, David decided he wasn’t just a food delivery boy, he realized with God’s help he could fight. And fight he did, successfully, against quite the enemy, Goliath.
Are we choosing to be a child, an adolescent, or an adult?
If there are different generations in your group talk about this idea of adolescents and how it has evolved even in the last 50 years. It is such a prominent idea now in America we hear people saying negative things about families who have their teen children contribute at home, saying they are missing out on just being kids. We also have a huge group of these 18-29 year olds who believe it is their right to have this period of high freedom with low responsibility. Even to the point of those 20-something’s who don’t get this freedom like their peers, maybe because they started a family or had to “grow up” to take care of an older generation, fighting against the gospel transforming them into people of responsibility. Even feeling resentful of their responsibility to be a parent.
Psalm 127:3-4
Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him. Children born to a young man are like arrows in a warrior’s hands.
Do we believe that passage to be true? That they are good and a gift? If so, we HAVE to value this role of responsibility and encourage others to also.
The Bible has many warnings and encouragements to parents about the importance of being a parent. Here are just a few in Proverbs.
Proverbs 4:1-9
My children, listen when your father corrects you. Pay attention and learn good judgment,
2 for I am giving you good guidance. Don’t turn away from my instructions.
3 For I, too, was once my father’s son, tenderly loved as my mother’s only child.
4 My father taught me, “Take my words to heart. Follow my commands, and you will live.
5 Get wisdom; develop good judgment. Don’t forget my words or turn away from them.
6 Don’t turn your back on wisdom, for she will protect you. Love her, and she will guard you.
7 Getting wisdom is the wisest thing you can do! And whatever else you do, develop good judgment.
8 If you prize wisdom, she will make you great. Embrace her, and she will honor you.
9 She will place a lovely wreath on your head; she will present you with a beautiful crown.”Proverbs 14:26
Those who fear the Lord are secure; he will be a refuge for their children.Proverbs 20:7
The godly walk with integrity; blessed are their children who follow them.
How does parenting in a “Let the Professionals” mentality look different that an “I am responsible for discipling my children” mentality?
Are we living as an adolescent toward discipling our children?
At the women’s marathon Bible study a few weeks ago the ladies learned about an idea Lysa TurKeurst calls “imperfect progress”. If any ladies in your group were there encourage them to share this idea. If not, here is a brief explanation. When we set goals to change we aren’t likely to be perfect on day one with our changes, but any progress, even as imperfect as it might be is progress. If we decide we are going to start being the one who God has given the job of showing our children Himself, but tomorrow we mess up, we don’t have to throw the idea out. Instead we can call the moments that we leaned on the Lord in choosing to be parent instead of adolescent progress and keep praying for the gospel to transform us so we can make the gospel relevant to our kids.
Lastly, what are ways you can move from a professionalism mentality to a responsibility mentality, even if it is imperfect progress? How can the LifeGroup help each other to impact the future ages? Maybe it is using the app talked about Sunday, maybe it is pointing to Jesus’s provision in your family, maybe it is taking advantage of the moments you have with your kids with directed conversation instead of silence.