If you have children, how did you learn to parent? Who or what serves as your model or guideline for parenting?
One a scale of 1 (They’re only kids, let them do what they want) to 10 (I run a tight ship and the kids better fall in step), where would you place your parenting style? Explain.
How does your spouse’s parenting style compare/contrast with yours? What happens when differences arise between your styles? How do you get beyond the differences?
Ephesians 6:1-4 NLT
Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. “Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise: If you honor your father and mother, “things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.” Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.
Colossians 3:20 NLT
Children, always obey your parents, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not aggravate your children, or they will become discouraged.
Why do you think Paul, and thus the Bible, have commanded children to obey their parents?
What rationale did Paul give in these two verses for children to obey their parents? What significance do you see in his statements that “this is right” (Eph. 6:1) and “this pleases the Lord” (Col. 3:20)?
Since Paul commanded obedience to parents and identified such obedience as right and pleasing to God, what is the implication for parents who fail to train their children in obedience?
Exodus 20:12 NLT (one of the Ten Commandments)
Honor your father and mother. Then you will live a long, full life in the land the Lord your God is giving you.
Deuteronomy 5:16 NLT (repeat command)
Honor your father and mother, as the Lord your God commanded you. Then you will live a long, full life in the land the Lord your God is giving you.
From Exodus, Deuteronomy, and Ephesians, what is the benefit or “promise” associated with obeying parents? Is there a connection between obedience and life going “well with you,” or is the benefit merely an arbitrary action on God’s part? Explain.
In the Ephesians passage above, what is the negative command Paul gave regarding how to guide children? What positive alternative did he offer?
How do parents “stir up anger” in their children? How can parents avoid stirring up anger while still faithfully guiding their children to be obedient?
What steps can parents take to stimulate their children to obedience?
What significance do you see in Paul’s exhortation that parents “bring [their children] up in the training and instruction of the Lord”? How do parents do that? Why did Paul address this admonition to fathers/parents, rather than pastors or children’s ministers or Bible study leaders?
What goal do you have in mind as you parent your child(ren)? How does your parenting accomplish your responsibility to provide “training and instruction in the Lord” to your child(ren)?
Would an observer in your home likely say you “stir up anger” and “exasperate your children,” or not? Explain. What might you need to do differently to more closely reflect Paul’s principles from these passages?
