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Sunday’s message was about “Church Burn.” I tried to spend a lot of time during the message identifying with people who have experienced it, and received quite a bit of feedback. In fact, this topic seems to have touched a nerve for some people. Why do you think that is?
Why don’t we agree right now to refrain from telling our own church burn stories until after this discussion?
You probably know people who had a bad experience, and got burned by church, so they stay far away.
Of course, those same people have had a bad experience at a restaurant or two, but they don’t stay far away from restaurants, do they? So, why do you think church burn is so much more intense?
I think all this happens because of one of my favorite Celebrate Recovery sayings:
Hurt People Hurt People.
What does this phrase mean? Have you seen this yourself? (remember, we aren’t airing our dirty laundry here.)
The good news is that God is close to the brokenhearted.
Psalm 147:3 (NLT)
He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.
He “bandages wounds.” Isn’t this what he does to all of us? Aren’t we all in the process of being made whole?
Luke 4:18–19 (NLT)
“The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, for he has anointed me to bring Good News to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim that captives will be released, that the blind will see, that the oppressed will be set free, and that the time of the Lord’s favor has come.”
What do we call this process of healing in our lives? (hint: it is the “process” part of our salvation)
So, if all of us in the Body of Christ are in this process, then who has completed it? Who has “arrived?”
So, all of us are still, in some way, “hurt people.” We are all still healing, still growing, still becoming, right?
How does the following verse explain this process, and how should we engage in it?
John 8:31–32 (NLT)
“You are truly my disciples if you remain faithful to my teachings. And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”
What happens when someone wrongs us, and potentially burns us? How does the next verse say we should respond?
Romans 12:19 (NLT)
Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say,
“I will take revenge;
I will pay them back,”
says the Lord.
John 13:34–35 (NLT)
So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”
Why is that so hard for us burn victims?
It is always really easy to point our finger and blame others in our hurting… But how do the following verses describe how we SHOULD deal with our hurt?
Psalm 139:23–24 (NLT)
Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.
Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.
Matthew 7:5 (NLT)
Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.
How would that affect the way we talk? The way we pray? The way we engage?
We never experience healing when we choose to gossip, to “air our dirty laundry,” to blame and point fingers. In fact, that is more like allowing the wound to remain dirty and to become infected. It will only make us worse. Not better.
Thankfully, Jesus gave us a great example.
1 Peter 2:22–23 (NLT)
He never sinned, nor ever deceived anyone.
He did not retaliate when he was insulted, nor threaten revenge when he suffered.
He left his case in the hands of God, who always judges fairly.